- Pick them up suddenly without warning from school rather than having them take the bus.
- Tell them we are going to a friends house.
- Allow the other children at the friends house to explain to the children that the 3rd family that is there is fleeing an abusive relationship ( said in kid terms though not adult ones)
- When kids come in from playing in the yard let them play video games all afternoon which is something they never ever do.
- Turn off screens and make them eat dinner.
- Allow the host to let the children know that there will be fruit after soup bowls are emptied thereby creating no desire for another bowl of soup even though the child is still hungry. Insist that the child needs to eat more but then relent because you are not interested in a tantrum and let them have fruit saying that there will not be anymore dinner later.
- Wait a little bit to long to take the kids home so that it starts to interfere with bedtime routines and they start trying to wrangle more food out of the hosts.
- In the car have a long conversation about why our friends are getting a divorce and how that works. Make references to the kids feelings and such.
- When the child moans that they are starving remind them of the choice they made about their meal earlier.
- Leave the child in the downstairs bathroom alone for 30 seconds (literally) while you run upstairs to get his brothers puffer out and then catch him stealing a candy cane ( left out on purpose) and then yell at him when you catch him.
I am not all surprised he lost it and once he started to calm down he had a good cry, like a good sobbing cry and went to bed calmly but oh my it was a really long hour once we got home. I don't regret going out and supporting my friend but perhaps I could of made some better choices to keep Calvin a little more regulated.
6 comments:
The challenge of doing something out of the routine. It's something I struggle with all the time. A good cleansing cry.....I could use one of those.
I am heading down to FL for a couple of weeks trying to prepare that my RADling is going to go crazy. He is coming too, but the mere fact that his school and routine will be disrupted will totally throw him for a loop.
I want one of those cards!! Oh, the joys of RAD. Hope today is better!
Our RADishes just love the changes in routine, topped with a little stress borrowed from others. {{{Hugs}}}
oh, Gosh. Any one of those things would throw us into a tailspin! I hate it, because I thrive on having small adventures- random family outings, trying new things, exploring new places, spontaneous dinner parties- ALL things that make my lovely RADish very, very anxious. *hugs* Hopefully, underneath it all, he picked up a little lesson on "How We Take Care Of Our Friends".
which is why I absolutely NEVER do anything like this without preplanning. and of course these things can't be preplanned.
which of course means i never do anything like that. which of course means I'm inaccessible to people. Which of course means I have few friends. which of course makes me angry and depressed which of course makes my RAD rage.
tada!
that's how you do it in ONE step.
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