Twelve Septembers ago, in the fall of my third year of "higher education" I sat in a class at a university were the majority of the students were male ( I called them boys) and female students were few and far between. In this particular class, History of the First 5 Centuries, there were 4 other women. I sat with 2 of them at a table near the back next to the window. Behind me sat 2 men who I had yet to meet. One was my age with a babyface, the other older than I and quick to crack a joke. I took them in as just another couple of guys at a school where that was the norm. As it turned out they were both Roman Catholic seminarians in their first year of studies.
The semester moved along and we joked with one another and made cracks about other students, professors and life in general. Fall led into Winter and I became friends with those "boys" who sat behind me. We had other classes together and began to meet in the cafe at coffee breaks. They were nice enough boys and the joker made me laugh. The joker began spending more time with me and a few of my friends, he fit right in with our left leaning liberal views and our deisre to change the world.
3rd year turned into 4th and the joker and I had more classes together, I used to copy his notes when I skipped class. I confided in him about the boy I had a crush on as they were friends and I thought maybe he could hook us up. I invited him to parties at my house, including my 25th birthday party when he gave me a miniature telescope so that I could always see my dreams. He was great friend and I felt lucky to have him in my life.
In my last year of univeristy I was on a different campus and didn't see him to often, we saw one another at parties and the occasional school function. That summer he and his teenage son helped me move and around the same time he decided that being a priest was not what he wanted and instead began a master's degree.
As I struggled to find a teaching job we kept in touch and got together with other friends occasionally. When I decided to leave for Asia he stored my stuff, bought my TV and came to my going away party. We kept in touch over email. I confided in a number of friends that if I was older or he was younger I would marry him. He didn't seem interested though and so off I went to Korea with his email address and a miniature telescope.
We kept in touch while I was gone, I missed him but I missed everyone as I was so far away. I came home 18 months later and he was the first one to call and welcome me back. We saw each other soon after for coffee and then a few days later for dinner. I muttered to my friends about him and wondered if maybe I was missing something. Days turned into weeks and we were spending more and more of our free time in one anothers company.
Before I knew it I tripped, fell and was in love with the joker, the one who I told about all the other boys that I liked. The one who laughed at my corny jokes, drove me home on cold winter days and worried about me when I was overseas alone. Fall led into winter again and by the time Christmas came we were engaged.
We were married, enjoyed one another alone for 2 years and then adopted Fudge and Calvin. I could not ever imagine doing this parenting dance with anyone else. He gets it, he understand it and more importatnly he is committed to being a therapeutic parent.
Five years ago today we were married and so, to celebrate the fact that I love the man I married and that I have never been as sure of anything as in my life as I am about him I share with you.